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Does this sound like the story of your life? You get up early so you can get your family up and out of the house and on their way to school and work. You walk the dog, feed the pets, and wonder if you’ll ever have time to exercise again. You prepare your presentations for today’s appointments and gather info on the companies where you will be going. You prepare a proposal for a client who is “this close” to buying and march out the door with your shoulders thrown back and your head held high. During your day, sometimes you hear “Yes.” You also hear “Maybe,” and you also hear “No.” Each and every “No” steals a little bit of your enthusiasm.

Then you head back to your car (maybe you should just hang your diploma there – you spend more time in the car then your office!) to pick up the kids, help with their homework, cook (or sling together) dinner and after tidying up a little, you hit your home office for computer and paperwork. You sometimes even fall asleep with your laptop on your chest and your office lights still on. Tomorrow comes all too soon and it’s time to get everybody up and out of the house once again.

Are you overwhelmed with all you have to do each day? Are you stressed out? Are you struggling to balance your work life with your home life?

Want to feel calmer and more centered?

The strategy is clear: stop focusing on your negative thoughts. One of the main causes of your stress is the negative thoughts that cycle through your mind. You know which ones I mean: “I need to finish this spreadsheet tonight. I cannot believe I left so much of this to the last minute! I’ll never finish it tonight. This job is crazy – how do they expect me to work all day and still finish up all this paperwork at night”, etc.

If you keep up this train of thinking, you’ll feel anxious and panicky in less than a minute. You’ll be future-thinking – worried about what will happen next – and you won’t be able to calm down and relax in order to take care of what needs to be done.

Think of stress as a windmill

Imagine that the wind that moves your stress windmill are negative thoughts. And the more negative thoughts you have, the “faster” your windmill turns. It’s not an exaggeration to say that many people – including me at one time – live in a state of perpetual stress. My windmill was on full blast pretty much all of the time, from first thing in the morning to last thing at night. I wasn’t in control anymore of the negative thoughts. I felt helpless and powerless. And that sent me into a negative spiral.

How do you do it?

The way you feel is determined by what you are thinking. You will feel anxious and stressed the more you try to think something through. The process of thinking itself is what is stressing you out. The secret to calming yourself down is to drop your negative, stressful thoughts and to quiet your mind.

One quick and easy way to drop your stressful thoughts is to imagine a red stop sign and say “STOP!” (You can just say it to yourself if you’re in public) and quickly drop the thought.

It is just a quick decision – every time a negative or stressful thought enters your mind, are you going to keep thinking that thought and follow it to more stressful thoughts, starting up the vicious cycle of worry and unhappiness, or will you say “STOP!” and just drop the initial thought?

As you practice dropping your initial negative, stressful thoughts one at a time as they appear, you will get used to the process and experience more and more relaxation, calm and happiness.

So after you’ve said “STOP!” what do you think of instead of your negative, stressful thoughts?

Not much! Seriously. By dropping the stressful, negative thoughts you can remain in the present moment. You won’t be ruminating about the past or worrying about the future. At first, this technique will seem quite strange. But in a very short period of time, you’ll start to notice something quite amazing – you’ll feel better. You’ll feel lighter and happier. Yes, you may still have to face the pressures of your career or home life. But once you start to zap those negative thoughts before they overwhelm you, you’ll be able to approach those challenges with a clearer, calmer mind – and make better decisions, too.

The other wonderful thing you’ll notice is that as your “stress windmill” starts to slow down and you begin to experience more peace, calmness and clarity in your life, you’ll also have the chance to start thinking about things that generate even more peace and joy in your life.

Right now, having a stream of those kinds of nourishing thoughts may seem impossible. And I totally understand that. However, I’m not asking you to believe me. I’m asking you to experiment and see the proof for yourself, in the “laboratory” of your own life.

Before you know it, you’ll regain control of your inner self, find the exit to your stress trap, and spend more time living in the present. And as you do this, it will be easier to turn your attention to what you appreciate about your life and what you are grateful for. Gratitude is a wonderful state of mind and is so much more nurturing than “thought attack” thinking! By practicing this strategy every day, you are taking a powerful step to ensure your happiness and longevity.

To learn more sales and marketing strategies, Sue has just written a book, “Zero Stress Selling: 5 No-Fail Strategies to Get More Clients and Fill Your Practice and you can buy it at Amazon today. You can also download a free Special Report with more tips and techniques to fill your practice at Zero Stress Selling

Sue Kasson wrote a book on stress management for women who sell. It is at http://www.amazon.com/author/suekasson

If you would like to find out more about Sue Kasson, Zero Stress Selling and this virtual tour, visit http://bookpromotionservices.com/2012/01/02/zero-stress-selling-tour/